Last weekend I fielded a great question from an audience member at a conference, and I thought it was worth sharing here because it’s a conundrum faced by many of us: what should you do if someone is speaking in a manner that demonstrates they are making inappropriate cultural inferences? Do you say something in the moment? Do you say something to them privately, later? Do you say nothing but act with that knowledge later?
One thing is for sure, I have only ever regretted not saying something – because to remain silent is to be complicit. So how do we say something in a way that doesn’t shame the other person?
If you can depersonalise the moment, it creates the opportunity for knowledge sharing and change without shame and embarrassment. For example : “something I have noticed recently that I wanted to address while we are all still here is that our choice of language is important and has an impact. By using the phrase “x” it can have the unintended consequence of “y” which I know was not the intention. Everyone’s lived experience is unique so avoiding assumptions limits the chances of miscommunication”.
Stay curious, and happy negotiating!
