It has been 8 short years since I started my mediation practice and I have learnt so much about business (and myself), that I wish I could have known so as to spare myself some of the heartache and angst. Of course, we learn our best lessons through challenges so I wouldn’t change a thing…but perhaps for those mediator’s just starting out (or anyone starting a business in the legal sphere) sharing these lessons will mean that you can learn different ones rather than repeating mine.
- It will be WAY more difficult to get your first mediation than you think. For me, it took 6 months. And it will take YEARS to develop any kind of consistent practice. So pace yourself.
- Mediation will be the hardest job you will ever do (but you will LOVE it). You will suffer migraines after every mediation for the first year from the sheer mental effort and concentration required – but you will develop a “mediation fitness” that will allow you to flow easily into that zone as if it was your natural way of being. Less effort, more ease.
- Not everyone is going to like you. You say this a lot as if it’s easy – but acceptance of this one is HARD. Also, you will meet many truly amazing people and you will beam with joy when you see those familiar faces at your mediation table. Solving difficult problems with friends is the world’s best job.
- Even when you think that you have “made it” or built a sustainable practice – you will hit a quiet patch. You will lose your favourite client and you won’t know why. But each time this happens (and it happens for everyone), it creates space for a new client to make their way to you. Trust the data of quiet patches past and please try not to drop into an existential crisis every time you have a quiet month!
- You are not in competition with anyone else. This is a big one. There is genuinely enough work for everyone who wants it. Mediation is one of those weird careers where you are selling the “vibe” of you (hence the challenge of No. 3) – so know what your unique skill set is and be brave enough to be open about it and its limitations.
- Find your village as early as you can. Find mediator’s who are starting with you so that you can feel comfortable learning together as you navigate this new world of unknowns. Then find a kind and generous mediator who is further along the path who can assuage your fears when you call them hyperventilating with what you term a “career ending” incident. Spoiler alert – your career continued just fine.
- People will say dumb stuff. If you are lucky, they will say it to you directly so you don’t have to guess what they are thinking. Then remember all of the dumb stuff you have said (and that your teenagers cancelled you for) and be kind in your response.
- Mediation is always autocorrected to meditation and your continued frustration at this amuses the meditation Gods.
Happy Negotiating!
